Navigating Loss Through the Power of Shared Stories

Loss is a universal part of life. Whether it’s the death of a loved one, the end of a relationship, or a significant life transition, grief touches everyone in different ways. It can be deeply isolating, casting a shadow over daily life and making once-simple routines feel hollow. Yet healing, though never linear or predictable, often begins through connection—with others, with ourselves, and sometimes, with stories.

Grief is profoundly personal. Some people express it openly, while others grieve in silence. There is no single path to recovery, no fixed timeline. What matters most is allowing ourselves to feel—without judgment. Suppressing emotions may delay healing, while embracing them, even in small, quiet moments, can begin to bring peace. Over time, we learn to live with the absence, remembering what was lost while gradually shaping a new version of life around it.

In this slow and often difficult process, support systems are vital. Family, friends, therapists, and peer groups can all help ease the weight of sorrow. And among these sources of comfort, one gentle but powerful outlet is often overlooked: the book club.

While reading may seem like a solitary activity, book clubs create shared spaces for reflection, empathy, and conversation. They offer routine and structure—something many grieving individuals crave—and they foster a sense of purpose. Discussing literature that explores themes of love, loss, and resilience allows people to process their own emotions indirectly, finding expression through the voices of characters and authors.

Books speak to the heart in ways that everyday language sometimes cannot. In a book club, stories become bridges—connecting people who may be grieving silently, helping them to feel understood and less alone. The act of relating to a character’s experience or sharing a personal insight during a discussion can be incredibly cathartic. Even for those not ready to talk openly about their pain, simply listening to others can offer comfort and perspective.

Ultimately, book clubs become more than literary circles. They are places of quiet healing, where shared narratives lead to shared strength. Through the pages of a novel and the kindness of community, those dealing with loss can rediscover hope, resilience, and the enduring power of connection. Stories, like people, can carry us through the darkest times—and help us find light again.

The Colorado Book Club Resource has over 1,300 set titles available for book club groups to get lost in, and some of them are specifically focused on navigating actual loss. Here is a sampling of titles that might be of interest. For other titles in the collection dealing with loss, please check out our online catalog.

Poetry:

• Dog Songs (2013), by Mary Oliver / Discussion Questions: A collection of poetry and prose celebrating the profound relationships between humans and dogs. It is a lyrical tribute to the unique bond between humans and their canine companions, portraying dogs as guides, teachers, and sources of boundless affection and wonder.
• Hum of our Blood (2017) , by Madelyn Garner / Discussion Questions: A collection of poetry serving as a deeply personal and poignant elegy, primarily focusing on the author’s experience as a mother grieving the loss of her son, Brad Braverman, to AIDS in the 1980s and 90s. The collection is a powerful and moving testament to a mother’s enduring love in the face of an unimaginable loss, set against the backdrop of a significant and painful chapter in recent history.
• Milk and Honey (2015) , by Rupi Kaur / Discussion Questions: A collection of poetry and prose divided into four thematic sections: “the hurting,” “the loving,” “the breaking,” and “the healing.” Instead of a traditional plot, the book traces a journey of generalized female experience through themes of abuse, trauma, violence, and pain (“the hurting”); shifts to love, desire, and intimacy (“the loving”); then explores heartbreak, loss, and emotional dissolution (“the breaking”); and finally culminates in themes of recovery, resilience, empowerment, and self-acceptance (“the healing”).
• When My Brother was an Aztec (2012), by Natalie Diaz / Discussion Questions: A collection of poetry that explores the complex and often painful relationship between the speaker and her older brother, who struggles with methamphetamine addiction, using the “Aztec” metaphor to represent his powerful, destructive energy and their Indigenous heritage. The poems also delve into themes of Mojave culture, language, historical trauma faced by Native Americans, love, desire, and the body, offering a deeply personal and emotional journey through family struggles and Indigenous identity.

Non Fiction:

• Crying in H-Mart (2021), by Michelle Zauner / Discussion Questions: A memoir chronicling the author’s profound grief following the death of her Korean mother, Chongmi, from cancer. The book delves into Zauner’s complex relationship with her mother, her struggles with cultural identity as a mixed-race Korean American, and how she navigates immense loss through the lens of food and Korean heritage.
• From Here to Eternity: Traveling the World to Find the Good Death (2017) , by Caitlin Doughty / Discussion Questions: Explores diverse death rituals and practices from around the globe. Driven by her experiences as a mortician and her dissatisfaction with Western death customs, Doughty embarks on a journey to understand how different cultures confront, mourn, and dispose of their dead.
• The Honey Bus: A Memoir of Loss, Courage, and a Girl Saved by Bees (2019), by Meredith May / Discussion Questions: A memoir about a young girl finding solace and stability in beekeeping amidst a chaotic and depressing family life. The memoir follows May’s journey through childhood and adolescence, showing how her bond with her grandfather and the lessons from the bees help her navigate emotional challenges and ultimately find healing and meaning.
• The Way Through the Woods: On Mushrooms and Mourning (2019), by Litt Woon Long / Discussion Questions: A poignant memoir that blends a personal journey of grief with an unexpected foray into the world of mushroom hunting.

Fiction:

• Everything I Never Told You (2014), by Celeste Ng / Discussion Questions: The novel begins with the stark announcement: “Lydia is dead. But they don’t know it yet.” The novel then unravels the mystery of 16-year-old Lydia Lee’s death in 1970s Ohio, exposing the deep-seated secrets, unfulfilled desires, and immense pressures within her Chinese American family. As the family grapples with grief, they discover that Lydia’s outwardly perfect facade hid immense loneliness and a desperate longing for self-identity, ultimately revealing how their unspoken expectations contributed to her tragic end.
• The Hours (2000), by Michael Cunningham / Discussion Questions: A novel that interweaves the lives of three women across different time periods and locations, connected by Virginia Woolf’s novel Mrs. Dalloway and the shared human experiences of love, loss, mental illness, and the search for meaning. The novel ultimately highlights how lives, even across vast spans of time and space, are intricately linked by shared human emotions and the enduring power of literature.
• The Lovely Bones (2002), by Alice Sebold / Discussion Questions: The narrator, Susie Salmon, is a fourteen-year-old girl who is brutally raped and murdered by her neighbor, George Harvey, in December 1973, in suburban Pennsylvania. The novel is told from Susie’s perspective as she observes her family and the world from her own personal heaven. As the years pass, Susie continues to watch, desperate for her killer to be caught. The novel explores themes of grief, loss, justice, memory, and the enduring power of love.
• A Man Called Ove (2015), by Fredrik Backman / Discussion Questions: Ove is a curmudgeonly widower in his late fifties, who, after his wife Sonja’s death, repeatedly attempts suicide but his meticulous plans are constantly thwarted by community members and a stray cat. He unknowingly becomes an indispensable part of his community, finding a new purpose in helping others. The story is a heartwarming tale of grief, unexpected friendship, and finding meaning in connection.
• The Midnight library (2023), by Matt Haig / Discussion Questions: The story of Nora Seed, a young woman overwhelmed by regrets who attempts suicide, but instead of dying, she finds herself in a mystical library between life and death, overseen by her childhood librarian, Mrs. Elm. In this library, every book represents a parallel life Nora could have lived had she made different choices. Nora gets to “try on” these alternate lives and learns that every life has its own challenges and imperfections, and that true contentment comes from within. Ultimately, she chooses to return to her original life, now equipped with a newfound appreciation and perspective to live it fully.
• On Earth We’re Briefly Gorgeous (2021), by Ocean Vuong / Discussion Questions: A lyrical, semi-autobiographical novel written as a long, unsent letter from a Vietnamese American son, Little Dog, to his illiterate mother, Rose. The novel is not driven by a traditional linear plot but rather by a mosaic of memories, reflections, and meditations that explore the family’s history, trauma, and identity resulting in an intimate exploration of memory, love, pain, and the complex process of forging an identity when caught between disparate worlds and haunted by history.

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About the Book Club Resource

Book club sets are circulated to participating libraries via the CLiC courier. Read all about the program on the Book Club Resource landing page. If you are interested in receiving book club sets but are not already a member library, use the online form to get signed up.

Since the BCR has always relied on book donations, we are deeply grateful to all the libraries, authors, and organizations that have donated sets and helped make the collection stronger. Please contact bookclub@coloradovirtuallibrary.org for questions or to discuss donations.